by: r.r.r.
http://youtube.com/results?search=colbert+roasts&search_type=search_videos
i haven’t laughed out loud like this in a real LONG time. see ALL of the videos. it’s stephen colbert making fun of the president…REALLY. thanks matt for the 411. 
r.r.r.
i love akbar in silver lake. it’s only a 10 minute walk from my house and everytime i go there…it’s always a good time. every monday night at akbar is happy hour all nite long.this means that well drinks are $3.00. Monday night is usally when i am there because it’s my “friday” and i want to shoot the shit of my week with my gay boyfriends. 
this particular monday that i was there…akbar won me over. my friends wylie and eric meet me there and we start to catch up. we get our 1st round of cocktails and the stories pour out. i decide to put on some music since their juxbox has an array of choices. I put the following three songs….
1. Luka - Suzanna Vega
2. The Joker - Steve Miller Band
3. Who’s That Girl - Euyrithmics
I go back to our table and we’re still chatting it up, the place is getting crowded…but it’s still kinda empty. Luke starts to play and wylie and i start to have our “luka” moment. we’re about to rock out to it until the bartender stops our track and says…”did someone order a taxi? it’s waiting outside.” and she skipped the song.
(dramatic music)
the fucking bartender skipped our song! wylie and i were heartbroken. this was our home bar and the bartender just shot us down our Luka moment. who in the ell does she think she is? was she not aware that Luka involves a touchy subject and for 1986…it was a huge shot out to domestic violence? The joker played on throught the place and we all couldn’t help but hate the bitch. since they’re weren’t that many folks inside…we thought that it wasn’t cool. We put our heads together and we decided to play Luka again…and if she skips it one more time…heads were going to roll. I wanted to play it 3 times…but I also realized that it was my home bar.
we played Luka again. it comes on and the bartender looked like she was going to kill. we couldn’t help but laugh out loud. i went to get another drink and she called me out on it. she asked if we were the “Luka” fans. i confesed to it and told her that the only reason why we put in again was because she was SO obvious on skipping it at 1st. She laughed and admitted that it was wrong to do so. She also admitted that she HATED the Luka song and she had a feeling that we put it on. But since she knew it was us…she laughed it off. We ended our conversation on good terms and I went back to the table and told the news.
akbar rules!
r.r.r.
I was waiting for the 304 the other day because i had to catch the 3:50 metrolink train. The 304 goes to Union Station. I get to the bus stop at 3:05…thinking I’m there with time to kill. But i look at my watch and it’s already going on 3:30. I didn’t want to miss my train…so I see a taxi coming up Santa Monica Blvd and I get the drivers attention. He pulls over and I ask him if he’s available. He says he is and I hop into the cab. Right when I get into the taxi, he starts asking me for the time. Even though there was this HUGE clock on his dashboard. He’s starts talking about how cute I look and automatically starts calling me baby. He’s CRUSING down sunset blvd, behind a school bus. I tell him that I need to get to union station and to take sunset blvd all the way down. He agreed. We are waiting at a light and he asks me…"I need to pick something up on Temple St from a friend. Do you want to come with me?" I told him no and I would like to just be dropped off at Union Station. All of a sudden, he gets off of sunset blvd, starts heading toward temple street and tells me that going on Temple to Union Station is the only way to GO!?! I tell him to pull the fuck over and he doesn’t want to. He starts telling me that it’s my fault that I didn’t want to go with him to Temple St and that I brought this experience onto MYSELF?!? But the mofo pulled over and I paid him w/o tip. Missing my 3:50 Metrolink train. BOO!!
But coming back to Los Angeles the next day was pretty interesting. I got on the last Mertrolink train to LA/Union Station. I was reading the recent issue of Blender and listening to Natalie Merchant. This girl comes up to me and asks to read my magazine. I told her that she could actually have it because I’ve read everything I wanted to and I was annoyed with the Chappelle article. (the chappelle article wasn’t even an interview with chappelle. blender magazine just photoshoped some chappelle photos and wrote a recap of his 05′ career…and put those stupid photos on their cover because they knew it would sell…bastards!) she thanked me and gave me a small amount of pot to repay the favor. she also admitted she was high as a kite. we talked the whole ride through about music, dating, people, los angeles, our astrological signs, etc. it made the metrolink ride go a lot faster and i even made a friend.
shot out to alesha!
r.r.r.
these last two weeks have been a trip for myself. i am fully recovered from the worse cold/flu/strep throat illness i ever had. it fucked me up royally. i’ve been living in LA for 6 months. time has flew by too quickly. i can’t believe we are in march already! i also have a boyfriend. i am not complaing about that at all…but it’s just been a long time.
having a boyfriend is kinda cool. it’s bringing up personal stuff for myself though. not that it’s bad stuff…but it’s just all of my drama from the folks that i have been with before. it’s not my fault i’ve dated some assholes the last few years of my short lived life. giving my energy to folks who took advantage and letting them get away with it. i’m just tired of getting hurt. i need to start trusting matthew and not compare him to the others. it’s hard, but i know i can do it. he’s worth it.
i am not dropping my sociology class after all. i am going to stick it out. my teacher may not be perfect…i just need to take what he says with a grain of salt. i do fit the militant bisexual stereotype when i am in that class. it’s kinda funny.
i want to visit the bay area soon. i feel like the drive of going up there is disappearing. is it because i am feeling more comfertable down here? i still feel like i left a part of myself in Oakland or on BART. i miss my siblings and i miss my sister’s kids. i just need to give more effort now to make it up there. it’s not like pulling teeth or anything…i just need to get it together.
…the end.
r.r.r.
i hate it!!! it sucks!!! i feel like my immune system has been completly shot since i’ve been in los angeles. it’s annoying! i barely got my voice back today. i have this cough that won’t quit!!! drinking water and liquid until I can’t stand it anymore. Nyquil should be illegal. that stuff always does myself in in! i even got my boyfriend sick…heh. i don’t think i know anyone who actually enjoys being sick…but i love to complain…so there.
i decided to drop my sociology class at LACC. my teacher is homophobic, racist and a complete moron. i hate the fact that i am actually paying money to hear his stupid lectures that are not accurate at ALL!! i can’t believe he’s the head of his department!! dropping it like a bad habit…
r.r.r.
i really can’t. i think i’ve met someone. it’s more than think though…i’ve met someone. he’s pretty neat. he’s more than that though…he’s pretty hysterical and sweet as sugar. we’ve been going out for a month as of today. i know he’ll be reading this though…since he’s my friendster "friend"…so i really can’t put the truth of how much I really don’t like him…HA! i can be rather picky about who i get with. but down here in LA…it’s pretty hard to find down to earth folks who aren’t filled up with the whole fake "I’ll call you, we’ll hang out soon" crap. it’s ridiculous.
i finally registered for a class at LACC. It’s a sociology class called American’s Social Problems. I can’t fucking wait to break it down with folks and learn more about how this country is fucked up! It starts next week. Joy.
i got to work now. D’oh!
r.r.r.
i had this dream last night. if this dream would to really happen…i would be ecstatic and oh so fuckin’ happy.
i drempt that i was working on the sales floor of my job. it wasn’t too crowded and folks were asking questions when they felt they needed to. i go in the back room too wash my hands and all of a sudden, my co worker calls for me. i rush over and she tells me that george clooney was in the store. i didn’t believe her until i saw him, looking at the glass dildos, making his way around the place. all my co workers were star strucked and felt like they couldn’t ask him if he had questions or anything. i put my game face on and i went up to george clooney and asked if he had any questions. he started asking about the company itself. how long Babeland has been around, saying that he’s passed by the soho store a lot, friends told him about the web site, etc, etc. i was rolling with it, i was rolling with george clooney! all of a sudden, the subject changes…
he’s starts asking about my tattoo outline. i start talking about my "work in progress" tattoo sleeve of my grapevine. why i chose to get a grapevine and how it’s going to cost an arm and leg to get that shaded in and all that jazz, like going to oakland and all the work it’s going to take, blah, blah. he told me that my arm and my other visible tattoo work looks great. i smiled and nod. we started talking about cesar chavez, unions, workers, politics, bush, etc, etc. since our conversation wasn’t exactly about the "store", i told him that if he had any other questions…to give me a holler. he smiled and said "thanks. nice to meet you rachel." And he shook my hand. I thought that was a bit much…but whatever.
i walked to the back of the store almost ready to faint. all my co workers told me that i was smooth…but i felt like i was ready to fall over. after i got it together…i went back on the sales floor and back to the register. george went right to the register and ask me…"Hey Rachel, how much do you think it will cost to finish your grapevine?" I looked at him like a deer caught in headlights. Completely speechless…I just gave him an random number. $5,000.00. I also told him that this number included the round trip flights from LA to Oakland and the deposit, etc, etc. Not that I’ve been thinking about it too much. Heh. He smiled and asked how long I would be at the store, I told him 8 pm. He offered me the $5,000.00 to give me to get my grapevine finished. I looked at him and didn’t say anything. He chuckled and said that he would be right back. He left the store and I started laughing hysterically. All my co workers were speechless and started laughing with me.
George Clooney came back to the store later that evening and gave me $5,000.00 in cold hard cash. I told him that i didn’t want his charity. i let my stubborn ego get in the way…but only for a lil’ bit. i took his money and thanked him. he told me that he would visit the store in a few months and couldn’t wait to see how my grapevine would look like. i started crying and he gave me a hug. i walked him out of the store and i was left with a suitcase of $5,000.00 cash.
Point of story: I need to find a sugar daddy to pay for my tattoo. straight up!
r.r.r.
this is my horoscope for the comin’ week. i am posting this because this felt so darn real at where i am at right now…it’s that deep.
wow!
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I know people who love the feeling of family but
who don’t have much contact with their parents and siblings and haven’t
started their own broods. Instead, they quench their longing for an
intimate network by hooking up with a spiritual family–a tribe of like-
minded people who share their values. The coming months will be prime
time for you to either find a group like that or, if you already have one, to
deepen and expand your web of connections. You don’t have to sacrifice
your relations with your biological kin to do so. The more family you have,
the better your mental health will be.
r.r.r.
about school before…ever! I am going to LACC for the 2006 Winter semester and I am stoked. i am stoked for a few reasons. I’ve realized just working full time in a city I feel completely out of place is driving me a lil’ crazy. I also feel that some social interaction would be nice. I haven’t done any kind of performances of any kind and I really miss that. I also got this writer’s block that won’t go away. Maybe a creative writing class will do the trick? I heard that LACC has a great theater and film/cinema department. When I got my letter from LACC saying it was OK to register now…it totally made my night. I also think that going to a brand new campus and exploring what they have seems cool too. I am taking no more than two classes though. I just want to stimulate my brain on the artistic tip. Or maybe a philosophy class? Who knows really. I am just excited to go back to school…and that’s never happened ever in my 25 years of living.
I am also getting an tattoo today. I am getting the words "think twice" on my wrist. Think will be on my left and twice will be on my right. I’ve been thinking about it for the last 4 months now. It’s totally the right time to do it. It will be an constant reminder of what to do in the future. Because I can’t turn back time on certain relationships or scenarios of my past….stuff that went down just went down ya know? I got no regrets. The text is going to be like a typewriter…black ink…pretty simple.
I can’t believe how time has passed this year. It’s gone by too quickly. I would of never thought last year at this time that I would be in LA right now. I can’t wait to see what 2006 would bring for myself, my siblings, my friends. Good times this year though. Good times indeed…
r.r.r.
r.r.r.
it’s cloudy down here…i wish it would rain. i miss the cold weather. 
i just saw most of season 4 dvd’s of six feet under and it just reminded me how fucking awesome this show is. i miss it terribly. i have seen most of the episodes of season 4 before…but my friend was on an six feet under kick and rented most of them. I am obsessed with the brenda and nate relationship. they have to be the most dysfunctional couple ever in the history of television. i heart nate!!!!
i’ve seen mr and mrs smith 4 times. i think i have a problem. in my defense…i’ve seen it for free all 4 times. i guess justifying the reason really doesn’t matter. but the sexual tension between them rules the school.
the end.
r.r.r.
